Sometimes that voice takes on the characteristics of an old English teacher, reprimanding incorrect spelling or misplaced commas.
Other times the voice is another authoritative adult telling us to stop whining and simply pick up the broken pieces of our lives and move on.
Still other voices shout that our feelings are not significant, not accurate, not worthy to be shared.
I’ve given my inner critic a name: Delilah. I recognize that sometimes Delilah is useful. She prevents me from making rash decisions. She helps me tone down language so as not to offend others.
But I do not listen to Delilah when I am journaling. I do not let her censor my thoughts and feelings.
But I do not listen to Delilah when I am journaling. I do not let her censor my thoughts and feelings.
When her voice becomes too loud to ignore, I simply call her by name, acknowledge her presence, and ask her to be quiet for a while. I tell her I will be happy to listen to her later, once I’ve finished writing. But for now, she is not welcome.
Delilah can be stubborn, and often she ignores my first request. But I am stubborn as well, and eventually she backs off.
Be persistent with your inner critic. Assume an authoritative role. Your thoughts and feelings deserve a voice, and your mental health depends on it.
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The next post in this Journaling series: L is for Love
Be persistent with your inner critic. Assume an authoritative role. Your thoughts and feelings deserve a voice, and your mental health depends on it.
* * *
The next post in this Journaling series: L is for Love
As long as my inner critic is only nagging me about spelling/punctuation errors, I listen, otherwise I tell her to shut up because I'm busy writing. :P I haven't named mine, but if I did it would probably be Deloris, after my grandmother. My grandparents raised me, and while I loved her to death, she could be overly critical of just about every area of my life (the stuff she knew about, anyway :P ), so that would definitely be a good name for my inner critic. I always tell people I'm my own worst critic, because if something doesn't look right I will tear it to little pieces trying to fix it until I get it right. However, if I feel it's just fine the way it is, anyone else saying otherwise is just going to get them an earful. *I* get to decide what is good and what isn't in my writing, not anyone else. I'm not writing for them, anyway, I'm writing for myself, so my opinion is the only one that matters. :P
ReplyDeleteI so admire your self-confidence, Christine! While I know I am writing for my eyes only, I still give too much thought and concern to what others might say. I'm working on this though...
DeleteWhat a fun idea, to name your inner critic. Hmmm. I need to give this some thought. K is for Kindle and KDP as you Build a Better Blog. #AtoZchallenge.
ReplyDeleteI find it really helps, Shirley ... especially when she is yelling at me :)
Deletethanks so much for stopping by!
I'm so glad I decided to click on the link that led me to your blog. First of all, I love the artwork and the little welcome message on top of this page. Hooked me right in.
ReplyDeleteYes, acknowledging 'Delilah' and any of her other mates like fear and uncertainty is the best way to go.
Hope to see you again.
K is for Khamir
Thank you so much for stopping Arti - for it gave me a chance to find your beautiful blog. I absolutely adore your description: words are my wine. I think I may adopt it as my motto!
DeleteI look forward to connecting with you often :)
This is so true, even when writing fiction. For first drafts, I have to quiet that 'Delilah' of mine, but I let her go to town when I start editing. I've heard that first drafts are for writing with the doors and windows closed (no Delilahs allowed), and subsequent drafts are for flinging them wide open.
ReplyDeleteoperationawesome6.blogspot.com/
Love the image of closing the doors and windows for the draft phase and then flinging them open for the edit phase!
DeleteIt is a constant battle to banish the inner editor when writing first drafts and journal entries. It is very worth it.
ReplyDeleteI'm still working on that... I tend to write a couple of paragraphs and then stop to edit. One day I hope to experience "the zone" and just write with abandon :)
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