I am in a good place.
It took a while to get here - and I know I can always improve but....I am in a good place.
I won't go into much detail here, although perhaps detail will be forthcoming, but suffice it to say that I have maintained a good writing regimen since February. I have maintained my morning pages via 750words, and in February I also developed a devotional routine, which has me reading two different devotionals at YouVersion (Rick Warren's - Decade of Destiny, and Joyce Meyers' - Promises for your Everyday Life).
While my summer was far from perfect, I must admit that this writing routine, coupled with Patti Digh's Verb Tribe for Teachers, helped me to maintain perspective and find peace - something that has been lacking in my life and I have wanted for years.
I went to our teacher in-service yesterday ready to start the year. I was teaching more classes than I wanted, but I knew that retirement was a mere three years away, so I was willing to continue. I adore my school - I love the administration - I respect the families - and like most of the students :)
But yesterday I learned that life could be even better than I ever thought possible. And again, without too many distracting details let me just say that I went into the meeting prepared to teach my full course load and I left the meeting lighter and freer than I ever anticipated.
There was a teacher there who wanted more classes - and who was more than qualified to teach the classes that I felt most inept. It was a win-win situation --- for the two teachers involved as well as for the students.
I never bothered to pray for my teaching schedule to be reduced. And yet....I desperately wanted it to be reduced. I have wanted it to be reduced for two years. At this time in my life I feel as though I have too many other interests to pursue: writing - photography - a greeting card ministry. And as I have heard so many times before: if not now....when?!
And then I received this little love-gift from God. Without asking for it in prayer - He knew my need and granted the desire anyway. How awesome is that?!
I am now teaching the classes that I truly feel called to teach: Brit Lit - Yearbook - Grammar - English Comp. Just the sound of those classes makes me tingle with excitement. Yes, this is indeed going to be a GREAT year.
Of course, I will no longer be known as the "super teacher" --- the one who maintains 10 different preps in the course of one academic year. And while I never did it for the accolades (I truly do love to teach).....I must admit that those accolades boost the ole self- confidence. And I must relinquish that crown to other "super teachers" But I believe that this, too, is a life lesson. I am doing what I am supposed to do: nothing more and nothing less. And there is great comfort in that.
I am learning that I am indeed...enough.
Great news! You'll get to do what you love most and still have the time you need for yourself.
ReplyDeleteThis might make your last years more bearable, however if you are like me, my reduction in hours and programs last year did not, ultimately, enable me to be willing to get through two more years of working at the library. Instead, I saw that the reduction in hours and programs did not, ultimately, make much of a difference in my life. It brought me to the realization that I had to take a stand for myself and tell my husband that I planned to retire in August, 2012, and that was that. No ifs, ands, or buts about it. We were financially able for me to do so, and so why was I standing in my own way, wasting my time doing things I no longer wanted to be doing, and being prevented from fully doing the things I most wanted to do. It brought my life and the decision I needed to make into very clear focus for me.
ReplyDeleteAwesome!! So happy to read this, Molly! You are definitely, delightfully enough:)
ReplyDeleteThat's wonderful! Isn't it amazing how things fall into place just like they're supposed to? :)
ReplyDeleteAmazing how God works these things out even when we forget to ask. :) Glad your schedule is lighter.
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